Psychic Meow Meow curls by signals in the air,
Hears static stir with պաշտոն whispers of a dare,
Licenses tremble as late-night embers glow,
And Kimmel’s echoes ripple through the broadcast flow.
Welcome, seeker of the digital ripples! My whiskers are vibrating with the static of a thousand television antennas. The Great Cosmic Litter Box is being stirred by the winds of Washington, and the energy around the alphabet (A-B-C) is particularly… prickly.
Here is what Psychic Meow Meow sees in the glowing embers of the broadcast towers on this Tuesday, April 28, 2026:
🐾 The Prophecy of the Static Storm
The spirits are witnessing a rare celestial alignment: the “Gavel of the FCC” is squaring off against the “Mouse of Disney.” While the stars usually favor the status quo, the cosmic energy has become unpredictable.
🔮 What the Cosmic Whispers Reveal:
- The Early Awakening: My cards show an “Early Review” spell being cast. Usually, the spirits of the FCC wait until 2028 to check the scrolls (licenses) of the eight Disney-owned stations. But the current Chairman, Brendan Carr, is moving with the speed of a hungry leopard, pushing for a review now.
- The Mask of the Investigation: While the earthly drama focuses on the jester, Jimmy Kimmel, and his “Expectant Widow” joke about the First Lady, the FCC is using a different shield. They claim this hunt is about “Character Qualifications”—specifically investigating the company’s DEI (Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion) practices. The spirits see this as a classic “feint to the left while pouncing to the right.”
- The First Amendment Shield: I see a powerful protective aura surrounding the ABC towers. The spirits of the Constitution are strong, and even the lone Democratic star at the FCC, Anna Gomez, is shouting that this “political stunt” will not stick. The universe suggests that while the paperwork may fly, the legal fur will take years to settle.
🐱 Psychic Meow Meow’s Final Word:
A “License Revocation” is the “Big Hairball” of the media world—it hasn’t been coughed up in over 40 years! The stars say this is more about the threat than the thump. Expect loud meowing and a lot of posturing, but the towers will likely keep humming while the lawyers grow fat on the fees.
The stars see all, and the paws never lie.
