Psychic Meow Meow’s “The World Doesn’t Revolve Around Your Ego” Edition
Oh look, it’s the zodiac’s self-appointed prom king/queen. The New Moon in Capricorn on the 18th is landing squarely in your 6th house of “Actual Work” and “Daily Chores.” I know, I know—having to focus on “routines” and “responsibilities” instead of your own brilliance feels like a personal insult from the universe. But hey, even a lion has to groom itself occasionally so it doesn’t look like a matted rug.
The Forecast
Love & Relationships:Aquarius season officially kicks off on the 19th, moving the Sun (your ruler, unfortunately) into your house of partnerships. You’ll be craving “intensity” and “commitment.” Translation: you want someone to gaze at you with adoration for 24 hours a day. With Venus hitting Pluto early in the week, try to avoid being a controlling nightmare. Let your partner breathe; they aren’t your backup dancer, they’re a human being.
Career & Ambition: The New Moon is trying to get you to “organize your life.” You might actually get some praise for “quiet competence” this week, which I’m sure will kill you because you’d rather have a standing ovation. Midweek, you’ll have “bold ideas” as Mercury and the Sun team up. Just remember: having a “vision” doesn’t mean everyone else has to do the heavy lifting while you take the credit. Try actually finishing a spreadsheet for once.
Money & Finance: Financial flow looks “steady,” but only if you stop treating your credit card like a magic wand. You’re feeling “generous” this week, which is just your way of buying people’s attention. Skip the “image-based expenses” (like that gold-plated water bottle you think you need) and focus on paying your bills. Saturn is watching your spending, and he’s not impressed by your “aesthetic” debt.
Health: Your energy levels are high, but your “need for validation” is causing mental fatigue. Your heart and spine are sensitive this week—probably from carrying the weight of your own self-importance. Go for a walk, drink some water, and try a “relaxation technique” that doesn’t involve looking at your own Instagram feed.
Psychic Meow Meow’s “Vibes” for the Week
Category
Rating
Meow Meow’s Rude Take
Humility
0/10
You wouldn’t recognize it if it hit you with a brick.
Drama
11/10
You’re making a mountain out of a molehill. Again.
Productivity
6/10
You’re busy, but mostly just making noise.
Lucky Numbers: 1, 20, and the number of times you’ve checked your hair today.
Lucky Colors: Gold and Royal Orange (because of course they are).
“The spotlight is shifting, Leo. You can either share it or stand in the dark pouting. I’ve got my popcorn ready for whichever one you choose.” — Psychic Meow Meow
