Oh, look who decided to swim up to the surface. Pisces, I’ve consulted the cosmic litter box, and frankly, the smell is more pleasant than your upcoming week.
Prepare yourself for the week of January 25th – 31st, 2026. Try not to cry on the forecast; it’s digital and I don’t want to short-circuit.
The Weekly Forecast: “Lost at Sea”
The General Vibe
Venus and Mars are currently squaring your sign from Gemini, which means your brain is a chaotic mess of “What if?” and “Why me?” You’re spending so much time in your “dream world” that you’ve forgotten where you parked your car—both literally and metaphorically. The universe isn’t testing you, Pisces; it’s just bored of your drama.
Love & Relationships: “The Delusion Zone”
With Neptune direct in your sign, you’d think you’d have clarity. Nope. You’re still romanticizing people who wouldn’t even let you borrow a pen. On January 26th, you’ll likely mistake a “Read” receipt for a deep, spiritual soul-connection. It’s not a twin flame; it’s a person who is busy. Stop projecting your entire life story onto someone who just said “hello.” It’s creepy.
Career & Money: “Financial Leakage”
Your “intuition” is telling you to buy something sparkly to heal your inner child. Your bank account is telling you to get a grip. With Saturn breathing down your neck, the “starving artist” aesthetic is getting old. If you spent as much time working as you do “manifesting abundance” while staring at a candle, you might actually be able to afford the premium version of the meditation app you never use.
Health: “Hydrate or Diedrate”
You’re approximately 90% water and 10% unearned guilt. You’ll feel “spiritually drained” this week, which is really just a fancy way of saying you haven’t eaten a vegetable or slept more than four hours. Get out of the bathtub and rejoin society. The fishbowl is getting cloudy.
Psychic Meow Meow’s Reality Check: “Escapism isn’t a hobby, and being ‘sensitive’ doesn’t give you a free pass to ignore your responsibilities. Pick a struggle and actually deal with it for once.”
