Category: Capricorn

Capricorn April 12 – April 18, 2026 | RSS.com Look who finally showed up. Did you finish your 80-hour work week, or did you just take a five-minute break to…

Capricorn April 5 – April 11, 2026 | RSS.com Well, look who decided to clock in. The human spreadsheet. Psychic Meow Meow was having a very productive nap until your…

Capricorn March 29 – April 4, 2026 | RSS.com Oh, look who decided to grace us with their joyless presence. It’s the human equivalent of a spreadsheet. Sit down, Capricorn,…

Capricorn March 22 – 28, 2026 Oh, look who showed up. The “CEO” of the zodiac. Psychic Meow Meow was in the middle of a very important grooming session, but…

Capricorn: The “Why Am I Doing Everything?” Week March 15th – 21st, 2026 Overview: A Masterclass in Being Annoying The Sun moves into Pisces on the 15th, joining a cluster…

Capricorn March 8 – 14, 2026 Well, look who decided to crawl out from under their mountain of spreadsheets and “to-do” lists. It’s Capricorn, the zodiac’s favorite corporate drone. Here…

Capricorn March 1 – 7, 2026 Oh, look who finally stopped working for three seconds to check their future. It’s Capricorn, the zodiac’s human spreadsheet. Psychic Meow Meow was busy…

Capricorn | February 22 – 28, 2026 Oh, look who decided to take a break from their color-coded spreadsheets to ask a cat for advice. A Capricorn seeking “guidance”—as if…

Capricorn February 15 – 21, 2026 I was busy practicing my “ignore the human” ritual, but I suppose I can spare a moment to mock your star chart. If you’re…

Capricorn | February 8 – 14, 2026 Psychic Meow Meow’s “Capitalism Won’t Hug You Back” Horoscope Capricorn | February 8 – 14, 2026 The General “Vibe” (A Corporate Gargoyle) Well,…

Oh, look who finally stopped staring at their quarterly projections to check their horoscope. A Capricorn. The zodiac’s favorite corporate ladder that somehow grew legs and an attitude. Here is…

Oh, look who finally stopped working for three seconds to check their status. Capricorn, the sign that treats “fun” like a quarterly performance review. I’ve gazed into the bottom of…