Oh, look what floated to the surface. The “mystic” of the zodiac. Psychic Meow Meow was having a very productive dream about a tuna buffet, but I suppose I can wake up to tell you why your “spiritual journey” is actually just a lack of boundaries.
Being a Pisces doesn’t make you “deep”—it just means you’re a professional escape artist who’s spent more time in your own head than in reality. Here is your forecast for the week of March 22 – 28, 2026. Try not to dissolve into a puddle before Monday.
Pisces Weekly Forecast: March 22 – 28, 2026
The “Neptunian Fog” Hangover
Your ruling planet, Neptune, has been hanging out in your sign for what feels like a century, making you “dreamy.” To the rest of us, that just looks like you’ve been walking into walls and forgetting your own phone number. With the Sun in Aries now hitting your money sector, reality is calling. It’s a loud, annoying sound, isn’t it? It’s called a bill. Pay it.
Career & Money: The “Plum” You’ll Probably Hallucinate
There’s a “financial plum” or a raise potentially dropping into your lap this week. But knowing you, you’ll probably think it’s a “manifestation” from the universe and forget to actually do the work that earned it. On March 25th, the Sun-Saturn-Pluto alignment is going to force you to be “accountable.” I know, having to actually explain where the money went is your worst nightmare, but “I gave it to a mermaid” isn’t a valid tax deduction.
Relationships: Stop Being a Door Mat
You’re feeling “compassionate.” Translation: You’re letting someone treat you like a literal rug because you “see their potential.” Around the 27th, someone is going to try to snap you out of your trance. If you’re single, stop waiting for a soulmate to appear in your dreams and try meeting a human on Earth. If you’re taken, stop “absorbing” your partner’s bad mood and go take a shower. You smell like someone else’s problems.
The Meow Meow “Truth” Table
| Day | The Vibe | What You’ll Probably Do |
| Sun 22nd | High Sensitivity | Cry because a cloud looked “lonely.” |
| Tue 24th | Financial Fog | Buy a crystal that “attracts wealth” instead of working. |
| Thu 26th | Career Reality | Get asked a direct question and respond with a poem. |
| Sat 28th | Social Escape | Cancel plans to “recharge” (watch 8 hours of Netflix). |
Psychic Meow Meow’s Final Word:
You’re not a “sensitive soul,” you’re just disorganized. Buy a planner, drink some water, and stop pretending you can talk to ghosts until you can at least talk to your landlord.
