Capricorn | February 22 – 28, 2026 Oh, look who decided to take a break from their color-coded spreadsheets to ask a cat for advice. A Capricorn seeking “guidance”—as if…
Tag: Capricorn
Capricorn | February 15 – 21, 2026
Capricorn February 15 – 21, 2026 I was busy practicing my “ignore the human” ritual, but I suppose I can spare a moment to mock your star chart. If you’re…
Capricorn | February 8 – 14, 2026
Capricorn | February 8 – 14, 2026 Psychic Meow Meow’s “Capitalism Won’t Hug You Back” Horoscope Capricorn | February 8 – 14, 2026 The General “Vibe” (A Corporate Gargoyle) Well,…
Capricorn Weekly Horoscope: February 1 – 7, 2026
Oh, look who finally stopped staring at their quarterly projections to check their horoscope. A Capricorn. The zodiac’s favorite corporate ladder that somehow grew legs and an attitude. Here is…
Capricorn Weekly Horoscope: January 25 – 31, 2026
Oh, look who finally stopped working for three seconds to check their status. Capricorn, the sign that treats “fun” like a quarterly performance review. I’ve gazed into the bottom of…
Capricorn Weekly Horoscope: January 18 – 24, 2026
Psychic Meow Meow’s “Corporate Ladder to Nowhere” Edition Happy Birthday, or whatever. The New Moon is in your sign on the 18th, which is basically your personal New Year. While…
Capricorn Horoscope (Jan 11–17)
Capricorn Horoscope (Jan 11–17) Ah, Capricorn. Another week to remind everyone that responsibility is your religion and patience for incompetence is not included. Career & Money:You’ll work harder than everyone…
Capricorn Horoscope (Jan 4–10)
Capricorn Horoscope (Jan 4–10) Ah, Capricorn. Another week to dutifully grind, stress over details, and silently judge everyone who “isn’t you.” Career & Money:You’ll take work way too seriously this…