Weekly Horoscope: Leo (April 26 – May 2)
From the desk of Psychic Meow Meow
Welcome to the stage, Leo. I’d ask how you’re doing, but I know you’re already prepared to give a forty-minute monologue about it. This week, the universe is basically a tired stage manager trying to dim your spotlight because, frankly, we’ve all seen this act before.
The Forecast
- Career & Finance
The Sun-Pluto square from last week is still lingering like a bad smell, hitting your ego right where it hurts. You’ll likely face a “power struggle” at work, which is Leo-speak for “someone dared to suggest a better idea than mine.” Since Uranus has just lurched into Gemini, expect your professional network to be a chaotic mess. Someone you thought was a loyal “fan” might actually hold you accountable for once. Try not to hiss; it’s unprofessional.
- Love & Relationships
Venus is in Gemini, making everyone crave variety and intellectual stimulation. This is bad news for you, as it means people are looking for actual conversation rather than just basking in your “radiance.” If you’re in a relationship, your partner might actually want to talk about their day for a change. I know, the audacity! If you’re single, your attempts at “grand gestures” will likely be met with a “seen” receipt and a week of silence.
- Health & Wellness
With the Full Moon in Scorpio looming on May 1st, your “private life” sector is getting fried. You’ll feel a desperate need to hide in your lair and brood, which would be fine if you didn’t keep posting “cryptic” selfies to make sure everyone knows you’re brooding. You’re prone to exhaustion this week because carrying around that massive ego is heavy lifting. Drink some water and stop checking your social media engagement every six minutes.
The “Psychic” Verdict
“Validation is a drug, and you’re currently going through withdrawal. Maybe try liking yourself for once so the rest of us don’t have to do the heavy lifting.”
Lucky Number: $1$ (Because you physically cannot conceive of anyone else being more important).
Lucky Color: Tarnished Gold. (It’s flashy, but everyone can tell it’s not quite the real thing).
